April! Wow, Spring feels like it’s finally he-bhbbhbhbbbbb *GASP* Where did all this RAIN come from?! (The April 2022 Update)

*Audience applauds as I wring the rainwater out of my suit*

Oh, hey there, everyone! It’s time for the monthly email update!

But first, it’s time for some JAZZ FUSION:

Easily one of the most underappreciated genres in comparison to its level of advancement, Jazz Fusion (which itself has become a wildly-broad genre label) pushed the boundaries of music and emotion in relative silence before a brief discovery by “corporate culture” in the eighties.

Different days… hard to believe it’s been over 30 years now.

Also, the garden is popping along pretty well. Looking forward to seeing if I can defend my early cucumbers and tomatoes against frost, but the jury’s still out on that one.

Let’s talk about books.

Certain Vengeance is coming along pretty smoothly now

Certain Vengeance is coming along smoothly, smooth enough to seem like the reset release date of July 20th is looking pretty likely.

This one has been a difficult write, mostly because of what’s be going on in real life and with work to slow down the process – I’ve had my fair share of pitches to catch while writing this one.

Oh, and the same deal holds:

As a preorder special, you can get this awesome final installment of the Soot Knight series for 80% off by reserving your copy today.

It would be quite clever of you to go ahead and get it, considering you’d be paying 5 times as much if you waited to find out what happened with… that. I mean, I don’t know what that is particularly, either, but I’m telling you it’s going to tie up a lot of those “thats” that you’ve been pondering about with the series. I would tell more, but to be frank I don’t want to ruin the surprise with it all. The spoilers are pretty dense with this one, and the near-end twist is going to be awesome.

I can tell you that there’s going to be way more giant man-eating insects, way more wondrous explosions, and way more extreme fairy sass in this one. Those three things will be pushed to new echelons within the literary medium, so prepare yourself for new horizons of bugs, booms, and… uh, fairies, because that’s the only term I’d use to refer to a nice, polite girl like Effie.

The Newsletter from Giga-heck: Powerlist Narrative HO!

Or perhaps just “the updated newsletter is pretty fun” would suffice.

Fellow compatriot, analyst, and/or reader, let me tell you what every author seems to need these days:

A functioning newsletter with a group of awesome people (very likely to include you) who will actually read your updates to find out when a new book comes out – yes!

Anyway, for those of you who have hopped on the bandwagon and had their inbox invaded by delivery minion or any of his dozens of assistants yet, take heart, because the new set of emails (The Newsletter from Heck V.3) is now sending, introducing you to the likes of such household names as:

-Survey Minion!

-Butler Minion!

-Gunslinger Minion!

And many, many more. Just get a look at these maniacs:

Exciting bunch, ain’t they? The High Overlord’s gone into total overdrive infesting as many poor sods to his will as possible. I think he believes it’s some kind of game to him, and I suppose it is, because it is folly to defy his will.

Anyway, check your spam filter (or gmail’s precious “promotions” tab) because they’ll be annoying your inbox with another “story arc” in the great legacy of Delivery Minion and his letters. This time there’s a crazy competition to see who can deliver the most while our ol’ scooter boy’s down for the count, but he’s not about to be shown up by a bunch of upstart rookie deliveryminions!

Show ’em who’s boss, Delivery Minion! Punch those pretenders in the stupid, rotten mouths!

Uh-I’m sure this is how a newsletter’s supposed to work, right? 90% getting pestered by book characters, 10% release news? Does that ratio sound right?

I’m sure it is, whatever. I don’t control them anymore: they know where I live!

That’s big news, but what’s next is EVEN BIGGER! … Wh- p-put those away! This is a family friendly update!

(P.S. on this one: Want to get on the newsletter but don’t know how? Click this minion and she’ll lead you gently, hand-in-hand, to the signup page. Don’t worry, Sign Minion’ll also make sure you can get a free copy of Woodcastle if you want it:)

“Hey, you: over here!” said the spider to the fly.


So I ran a little poll down in our resident Seaside Resort about what sort of book I should do next. It was a close battle running between a few of my “non holyverse” ideas: those books that are just being written because they’re super cool and good ideas for books, rather than building up the narrative between Chaos, Order, Rayda, Rondi, or any of those fine folks. One book idea has won out, and now I shall write it: with a release planned later this year.

This devilish “invader novel” has NOTHING to do with ANY of those losers, but is instead a book that’s it’s own character, issues, and worlds.

Progress and planning for this novel is going insanely fast, mostly because I’ve noted this one out for over five years, slowly beating the story into a cooler and cooler form.

It’s going to come out like a hot nuclear mess of outrageous magic-combat, cute (but mostly awkward) romance, and cringe-inducing puns. I’m going to edit this heap of glory and beat it into a manageable form within the year, because the fact of the matter is that it is writing something else that appears to rejuvenate me as I continue to labor against the millstone of The Great Work.

That said, expect an unexpectedly excellent book coming this year that will have much more to judge than its cover (which I’ll reveal leading up to release).

You’re in for a weird time, reader. I’ve never written a book like this one, and I’m enjoying it quite a lot.

Do you read wide, or exclusive?

My parting question is a really important one to me, actually, because it will absolutely shift my expectations for publishing in the future.

Riddle me this:

Do you read your ebooks wide (multiple platforms) or only on Amazon?

I think I’ve gained enough traction to start punching above my weight a bit, but I would hate to make a big marketing push to simply be brushed aside without the support of others, so if I do it, it’s going to have to be heavy, fast, and precise!

I’ve done wide publishing before, but never had much success, and to step out from under Amazon’s shadow would be scary, but let’s be honest, will eventually be necessary.

After all, you and I are in this for the long run, and with any luck we’ll both be able to write and read no matter what company is the “big cheese” today, or ten years from now.

Do reply back. I look forward to hearing your thoughts.


I love you, reader, only in the awkward sort of way your humble analyst could love a reader. I wish I could invite you over to my totally real (in the future) manor, where we can enjoy hot cocoa and discuss our favorite books together, play video games, and watch cool movies. Perhaps one day, for now, we’ll have to be content with what we have, a crazed minion newsletter, and a few books a year.

Your partner in secrecy,

Kell Inkston

2. Kell loudly appreciates your patronage, (and the coffee,) but values your friendship most of all

2 thoughts on “April! Wow, Spring feels like it’s finally he-bhbbhbhbbbbb *GASP* Where did all this RAIN come from?! (The April 2022 Update)

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