Hello! It's been a little bit, hasn't it? I'm so happy to speak with you again. I promise this update is chalk-full of both magic and wonder. Let's start off with some music and then hop right in to the good stuff. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFfzZmHLq20 And there's your bit of audio culture for the day - it's … Continue reading Slapped Silly under the Greivous Gaze of the Dark-Dude-Deadline, it comes down to one Alright Analyst to set things back in order. (The AHHHHH April Update)
In otherwords, X Yes, X! Like, just look at me: *Overwhelmed coffee sipping sounds* I have no big update for you this month; like think of the most minuscule Inkston Update you've ever witnessed through the years, and X that by X - that's what we're looking at for the April update. I understand your … Continue reading Bonked on the Head by a Ton of Work, it’s THIS analyst’s opinion that he needs a little bit of time to get all of his ducks in a row. (The March “Update”)
A twinkling of starlight, all warning sensors pinging off, a wide, white grin... and then death. That was the experience of Staff Sergeant Extine Avarta in the seconds it took Chaos to vault through the quarter kilometer distance between him and the block guard. He doesn't need a weapon, let alone magic to kill enemies … Continue reading Dirty, Rotten Thievery -Part Five-
First, some truly lovely music. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RKASDDMEPx4&t=385s Eastshade is a recently-released game about painting various things for animals - what a novel concept! It's exceptionally calm, captivating, and satisfying. I played it on a curious fluke, but I can assure you it's a grand time for anyone looking for an immersive, combat-free experience. Also, as I … Continue reading Wrecked, bedraggled, and utterly slammed by The Great Entropy, The Last Analyst continues boldly forward to bring fiction to the weeping masses (Or, the Delirious December 2020 update)
A calm, late-night tea room in Towerne is the host to a brutal murder. A die is cast from within the scope of the gameboard by a player far, far away, probably another dimension. "Nat 20, the overlord draws his epic blade through the knight and-" "NOOOOOOOOOO!" Shorts Minion screams at the top of his … Continue reading Desolation Scope: 4th Edition
As always, let's start with some tunes. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RwT6XFgs43w You may now say: "Thanks, dad, for letting me check out all your cool old person music!" Then I'll say: "You're welcome, kiddo," right before taking a sip from my brandy. Anyway, hello again! I guess it's time for another monthly update. We actually have quite … Continue reading Another Exceptional Month of Death and Learning: you don’t say, the May update!
1. “And here we are, Space Gate SouthWest!” the tour lady presents using one of her six porcelain hands to slow the trolley to a halt. The cart of nineteen tourists would have all rolled out an impressed “Oooh!” at the incredible sight before them: a miles-long entertainment plaza contained in the perfectly controlled interstellar … Continue reading The Killer Shopping Spree – a Short Story
It’s a typical day at His Inexorable Immensity’s Invasion Tower: the power torches burning hot and heavy as they burn a metric ton of astral coal every minute. The overcast sky pulls on for miles over the swamp where the lanterns amidst the gray silhouette of a frog-village twinkle cozily in the distance. It’s in … Continue reading Kingsday Gifts – A Short Story
Readers, As always, let's start with some good music. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dZDiaRZy0Ak I've heard that Ravel thought he was going mad writing this piece, as he couldn't move past the same set of bars repeating over and over. Of course now we have the genre of "minimalist music" that capitalizes on this trait, but back in his … Continue reading Strewn without mercy by THE HIDEOUS DEADLINE, one analyst is forced to forgo all morals and safety to survi- Oh, wait no, just the “Nasty November” Update.
True Generosity I. Lord Knight Captain Order, the proud head of her hallowed organization, slumps her head depressively into her arched and open palm. “-you see, if we can count on your generosity again this year, we should be able to get a-” Ugh. “-the children need a heated swimming pool, I’m telling yo-” Eh. … Continue reading True Generosity – a short story